


Don't Doubt It

by camichats



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Gen, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Marauders' Era, The Prank
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-16
Updated: 2017-05-16
Packaged: 2018-11-01 10:36:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10920099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/camichats/pseuds/camichats
Summary: James and Sirius talk after The Prank.





	Don't Doubt It

Sirius was shaking. He’d just visited Remus in the Hospital Wing, staying behind after the other two Marauders were asked to leave. When he told Remus he was sorry, Remus just gave him this sad look. Like he’d expected this. He didn’t accuse Sirius, didn’t look angry, didn’t say that Sirius had betrayed him. 

Remus, ever calm Remus, said he needed time to move past the incident, and even more time to learn to trust Sirius like he previously had. And he said he didn’t blame him. That whatever had happened to make him act that way must have been bad. Remus didn’t ask Sirius what had been said or done, and all he knew was that it had to do with Snape. 

Remus guessed that Snape had talked about his family, the Potters, and mentioned several of Sirius’s insecurities pertaining to both. 

Sirius was still shaking by the time he made it to the Common Room and up the steps to their dormitory. The shutting of the door was too loud in their dorm. There was always supposed to be noise where they lived, whether from snores while they slept or laughter or planning a prank. It was never supposed to be silent. 

“What did Remus say?” Peter asked, and they all winced from the sudden noise. 

“Just that he needs time,” Sirius responded quietly. 

Peter nodded, then stood, his hands rubbing over each other nervously. “I want to go get some chocolate for him. James can I borrow the cloak?” 

“Course.” Sirius wanted to flinch for the forced flatness in his tone. “Take the Map too, to be safe.” 

“Okay. Thanks,” he said after he retrieved both of them. He left, trying to keep the door closing as quiet as he could. 

It was a few minutes of awkwardly waiting before James talked, in the same tonelessness as before. “What the hell were you thinking?” 

Sirius did flinch this time. James had never talked to him like that before. There was always inflection, and usually happiness colouring it, sometimes anger, but always passion and this time… nothing. “I wasn’t.” 

And James couldn’t help but think about how wrong it was for Sirius to sound so beaten down because of him, because of his own friends. It wasn’t right, but he couldn’t focus on that right now. “Then what were you feeling?” 

There was frustration bleeding through James’s voice, and Sirius accepted it readily. He didn’t care if James yelled at him, hexed him, anything but the emotionless tone he’d used before. “I was angry.” 

“You’re bloody right you were angry,” James said, and this time there was only anger in his voice. “But it shouldn’t have mattered how angry you got, you should’ve never betrayed Remus like that, I don’t care  _ what _ Snape did to you.” 

“He didn’t  _ do _ anything, it was what he said,” Sirius said desperately. 

“Fine, then enlighten me. What did he say?” 

Sirius hesitated. “Please James.” He didn’t know what he was begging for, whether forgiveness or to not talk about this, he had no idea. 

James’s face hardened. “It can’t be worse than what you’ve done, so you might as well tell me.” 

Sirius looked down at his hands, tears already swimming in his eyes. “He said I was just like the rest of my family.” 

“He says that everyday!” James exclaimed, beyond frustrated. “And it’s never gotten to you like this, why should it? We both know it’s bullshit!” 

“Even now that I nearly killed him?” He paused, and when James didn’t answer, his shoulders slumped. He knew there was no way even James could defend that action. What he didn’t see was that James was fighting with himself because he wanted to comfort Sirius, but also let him know the extent of how bad what he did was. He was saved the struggle when Sirius continued, his voice strained. “He said you’d hate me once you figured out what I was really like. That you’d leave me.” 

James sighed, his anger moving to the back burner. He walked to Sirius and hugged him, but Sirius didn’t relax into it like he normally did. He remained stiff until James said, “I don’t hate you and I never could, no matter what you did. Why would you ever think that?” 

Sirius sniffled and pressed his face against James’s neck. “I-I don’t know. But- but he said he knew about us. That he’d tell everyone, and I knew that if he did, you’d be ruined, and- and I couldn’t let that happen to you. He wasn’t supposed to go that far! I just wanted to scare him a little, he was never supposed to actually get that close to Moony, I swear.” 

James had frozen for a moment when Sirius said that Snape knew about them, but he moved to pet Sirius’s hair as he gradually grew more distressed. “It’s okay,” he murmured, and kept saying it until Sirius calmed down marginally. “Did you tell Professor Dumbledore that?” 

He shook his head from where it was still tucked against James. 

“What did you say Snape said?” 

“Erm,” he took a shaky breath, “The stuff about my family, and that all of you would hate me once you got to know what I was really like.” 

James pulled Sirius’s head back and began wiping off his face for him. “What’s your punishment?” 

Sirius gave a shadow of smirk. “No Quidditch?” 

“What?” James squawked. “But I’m not going to be able to find a beater to replace you, and  _ definitely _ not one as good!” 

Sirius started laughing, at first because he couldn’t believe that Quidditch was what got the biggest reaction from James in their entire situation, and then he kept on laughing because he couldn’t stop. 

James joined him, and they didn’t stop for several minutes. They needed the stress relief, and ended up collapsing on James’s bed together, curled around each other. 

“So, are we okay?” Sirius whispered later. 

James continued running his fingers through Sirius’s hair as he thought. “I’m not mad at you. I don’t think I ever could be,” he said with a crooked smile that Sirius kissed the corner of reflexively. “I understand what you did, but you went too far. You can’t do that again Sirius, you won’t get let off with a slap on the wrist from Dumbledore, and gods only know why that’s all he did. We’re okay, Sirius.” 

James hesitated for a moment, then added, “Honestly, Pads, you could murder my parents and I’d forgive you. Just try not to do that, okay?” 

Sirius huffed a laugh. “Okay.” It comforted Sirius to know that there was nothing he could do to drive James away, but he wouldn’t test that, not again. He was going to give James no reason to doubt his trust in Sirius. 

**Author's Note:**

> I take prompts on tumblr [@siriuslystarbucks](http://siriuslystarbucks.tumblr.com/) or here in the comments ^-^


End file.
